Monthly Archives: November 2022

“It’s okay”

If today looks nothing like you had imagined

If today goes way different then you thought

If your plans get shattered in a million pieces

If there’s empty places at the table today.

If your emotions are all over the place

If you can’t answer one more question

I want you to know.

It’s okay to stop and take some deep breaths.

It’s okay to take a moment and just rest

It’s okay to grieve what should have been

It’s okay to grieve what could have been

It’s okay to grieve the losses that are big

It’s okay to grieve the possibilities of what if

It’s okay. Again I tell you. It’s okay.

It’s okay to acknowledge you’re not okay.

It’s okay to admit that you’re struggling

It’s okay to give yourself grace for the moment

It’s okay to take a moment and weep if needed

It’s okay. It’s okay. It’s okay. It’s okay.

Grief is crazy odd, showing up

At the most in opportune time possible.

It manifests itself in unique ways.

It’s okay to grieve. It takes time and space.

It’s okay to acknowledge that not every time and space is safe to grieve. It’s okay.

It’s okay to acknowledge you don’t

Always want it to be this way.

Acknowledge that as you heal

The journey will be hard and long.

But remember you Are Not alone.

It’s okay to wonder where God is.

But also know He is always with you.

It’s okay this Thanksgiving Day

To grieve the “could and should have”s

It’s okay to acknowledge those things.

But also remember you are Loved.

You are treasured and always will be.

By the Almighty God in Heaven

The One who knew you before time began.

It’s okay to not always be okay.

Grieving is hard, emotionally draining work

And you are Not alone on this journey

Lift your head and eyes toward heaven.

I wonder if you would allow yourself

To bask in the Goodness of God

For even just a moment or two.

He’s good. So so very good, He is.

He’s so kind. So gracious and loving.

He understands and He cares.

Even if it doesn’t feel that way.

He grieves with you and if you ask Him,

I know He will hold you close.

It’s Okay. Because God is our Healer.

“ I wonder…”

I wonder sometimes what it would be like if things would have been different, If life would have been more “normal” for me?

What would it be like to live without the effects of abuse for me as a person?
What would it be like to not have stare complex trauma in the face on an almost daily basis?
How would it be to not be triggered on a constant basis?
What would life be like?
What would I be like?
How much different would I be?

Abuse does weird stuff to a person. It messes with the inner part of us. It shatters the heart. It destroys trust and it seems like you are staring death directly in the face. It’s a cruel thing.

These questions and thoughts run through my mind often.
What if?
Why God?
How could you allow such suffering?
If you are a good God, why do you allow such awful things to happen to your children?

And so again I wrestle.
And still I question.

But of one thing I am sure. In our suffering, God desires for us to give Him our heartache, our shame and our pain.
He is present. During our suffering, in our suffering and while we heal. He, the God our Healer is present and for that I am Grateful ♥️

I wonder if in our suffering God draws closer, in fact so close that if we would we ask Him where He is, He would reveal He is holding us close to Him, weeping with us in our pain.

Still I am grateful that He is present, especially in our suffering. What an amazing God!