Tag Archives: faith

A Note on Trauma

Healing, Journey, , , , , , , ,
What is Trauma?

I have been a part of multiple conversations in the recent past that have been stark reminders of lack of awareness of how the things of life may affect any individual in any given circumstance.

To sum up the conversations, would be to say there are:

* Multiple views on trauma.

* Numerous opinions on what trauma is.

* Countless arguments why trauma exists or why it does Not exist.

Do you get the point?

There are countless explanations why people say that it exists or doesn’t, not to mention the thought that trauma is merely an excuse to stay in our pain.

Ouch!

That last one stings deeply for some of us and perhaps more mildly for others.

Wherever you find yourself on the spectrum of what trauma is and why it exists. Would you just hear me out on what I think is one of the best explanations of the T word, I have heard to date through my own personal journey of healing?

I don’t believe this to be new information for some of you and for those of you that it is new, may it begin to spark awareness to the effects of and then also the process of healing.

Trauma is when an event takes place in an individual’s life that is so overwhelming that the individual feels alone and overwhelmed with emotion and believes he doesn’t have the resources to handle what is taking place.

Now. Let me note this.

This tends to be more prevalent in young children, but adults are not exempt.

Yes. That’s it.

That’s how trauma happens/can happen.

And.

It. Is. Very. Real.

And hard.

And agonizing

And very wearing.

But. Then there’s healing.

Yes. Healing.

Which is allowing someone to sit with you to undo the aloneness so you can heal.

That also.

Is very real.

Very difficult

Extremely agonizing.

But also healing and freeing.

There are days I wish I could say I don’t know much of anything about it but I can Not be silent with what I do know.

Why is that you may ask?

In my own journey the silence only hurt me further, in fact silence only enabled people to continue causing tremendous levels of pain. Silence too can be traumatizing.

Yes. It’s true. Silence is seldom golden.

I do recognize there’s a time to be silent, the Bible even says so, but may we always be in alignment with the Lord on what we are silent about.

May I encourage you to educate yourself if you, yourself are on a journey to heal from trauma or if you find yourself in a place of being a support person a friend on their journey of healing.

Awareness/education and allowing the Lord to lead you, is absolute key, in walking with someone even if it’s vast unfamiliar territory to you.

You can’t heal anyone. Only God can do that! But He can and does use His children to be vessels if we are willing.

Once we have been the recipient of a grace that meets our vulnerability, we want to show the same kind of grace to others. This is what empathy does, it extends grace to others in order to create authentic connection. ~Hinman & Warner

Until the next inspiration.

~V

It’s Been 10 years..

Journey, , , ,

It has been 10 years and I will always remember that day. The morning when I stepped out the door. It was like stepping across the threshold to a life I had never expected to be a part of. It was the day I took a step, in desperation to find something I knew to be there but having no idea what it was or how I would find it. Think of it as, going on a journey with no map or directions.

It was the day I had spent close to a year preparing for. The day I would leave the Amish.

In the early morning stillness, I packed the last of my belongings in a trash bag, slung it over my shoulder, took one last look around the room, took a very deep breath and stepped out the door. I was no longer the Amish girl, that everyone knew. I was about to embark on the craziest of journeys that I had ever been on. I was leaving and I was not going to look back, nor would I go back.

I remember. The desperation. The anxiety. The questions. I was so desperate. If this didn’t work, I was done. It was going to be over. I won’t ever forget that desperation. The lumps in my throat. The “what ifs” that constantly plagued me. The constant questioning if this would even work. What would I do, if it did not work?

I didn’t have a backup plan that was a good one even if I did not recognize that fact at the time. I was just desperate to find what I thought to be there, but how would I find it? And where would I go?

I will not ever forget the loneliness that ensued me after that eventful day. The rejection. The difficulties. The fear of the unknown. The mountain of questions. The endless pain in my heart. The condemnation that plagued me constantly.

It was a scary time. it was a difficult journey. What kept me going was, my vow to myself “I will not fail at this.” I did not know how to pray; I just knew there was a God in heaven, and He surely would help me. I believed He would.

He did help me. He sustained me. He upheld me with His righteous Hand. He protected me. He is the reason I am still alive today to proclaim of His goodness and faithfulness!

I remember that cardboard box that served as a nightstand beside the worn-out mattress I called my bed. I remember going to bed and wondering if I would get any where in life, yet I was determined to not give up.

I remember wondering if I would ever belong anywhere. Would there ever be peace in my heart to replace the anxiety that was deeply rooted there? Would I ever really be glad for the step I took? Was it worth it to sacrifice so much to pursue something I knew to be there, but had no idea how to attain?

It has been 10 years. I, myself, can hardly fathom it has been that long, but I look back over the years and the Faithfulness of My Heavenly Father is etched and woven through every tiny detail of the journey.

What I was looking for, God has allowed me to experience. It was the joy and freedom I saw present in others, but seriously doubted it could ever be present in my own life.

This is not a “follow your heart” claim. Our hearts are dreadfully wicked without the Lord cleansing us, purifying us and making us whole. But it is a humble prayer of “Lord, I can’t but I know You can, please help me and lead me, I surrender to You”

I learned so many things.

I learned that God can be trusted. He is just as Good as His word says He is! He will always help us the Way He knows we need help, not just how we want Him to help us. He is faithful. He is kind. He is just. He is loving. He will heal the pain and hurt in our hearts.

He is the author of every testimony. He is the best writer and orchestrator of our lives. He will not fail. He is faithful. He is always good!

And remember. “The Only Big, is God”